That medical drama cliché
by shanqi
Summary: Elevators. Things that Audrey would be thinking about in my fantasy.


There's something about elevators. There are the sturdy metal panels that separate you from the world outside, the bell that announces your imminent return to reality and the hum from the ventilating fan. Sometimes it protects you from the chaos in the rest of the hospital, giving you a moment to put down the mask of confidence and professionalism you have to wear. Other times, it cages you into situations you want to avoid so badly you wish you'd taken the stairs.

Audrey had just been starting her residency when _Grey's Anatomy_ became everyone's favorite medical drama, including Laura, who only managed to entice Audrey to watch with the promise of her favorite tacos. She'd been irritated by the medical inaccuracies and disgusted by the ethically questionable relationships that seemed to be going on between everyone in the fictional hospital. However, there was nothing more ridiculous to her than the wide variety of purposes that the hospital elevator appeared to serve. In what world would you have the luxury of stopping and starting an elevator at will in a busy hospital?

Laura had laughed at her disbelief and outrage over another insanely passionate elevator kissing scene one time, warning her "It could be you someday", to which Audrey had scoffed. At that moment, she'd vowed to never let herself become some medical drama cliché by kissing a colleague in an elevator. She'd never have imagined that, over a decade later, she'd not only done exactly that but was currently finding it hard to keep herself from doing it again.

Neil had tracked her down in the corridors to update her on the patient he'd just lost in the OR. The case seemed very clear cut to her and she couldn't see anything wrong with Neil's explanation or the details in the file. She was just agreeing with his conclusion as the elevator doors opened for their ride back upstairs to their offices. Stepping inside with him following right after her, she's suddenly reminded of their encounter in the very same elevator after they'd spent their first weekend together last year, post-quarantine.

She remembers the elevator doors opening to reveal Neil standing there, looking handsome as always in his unbuttoned shirt and well-fitting suit. She remembers the high from their shared secret, Neil's much-too-happy "Hello" and her unsuccessful efforts to keep the corners of her mouth from creeping up. She recalls seeing him shuffling towards her, a smirk on his face and immediately knowing what he wanted to do. She'd known immediately he wanted to pull her into him, tangle his fingers in her hair and let their lips fight for dominance, like they'd been doing all weekend, like she'd once scoffed at those ridiculous fictional doctors for doing. And, against her better judgment and decade-long aversion to becoming a cliché, she'd wanted to let him. Fortunately – or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it – the bell had warned them of the doors opening and Andrews had inadvertently prevented them from getting too carried away.

Audrey suppresses a smile at the memory and hits the button for the fifth floor, turning to look at Neil only to find the same smirk plastered on his face. She resists the urge to smile back at him and has to look away to stop herself from reaching out to pull his lips to hers. She tries desperately to think of something to say, something normal they can make meaningless conversation about but all that comes to mind is the first time she let herself become that cliché, the girl who couldn't resist the hot guy in the elevator.

It had been Laura's fault – let's be honest, Audrey's whole issue with elevators was Laura's fault – she'd screwed up and accused Laura of doing the unthinkable, of hurting her own child. She'd fully expected Laura to be angry and to be yelled at but didn't anticipate that her best friend would tell her she didn't know love or how to commit. With her anger, Laura had forced Audrey to face the truth. Somewhere deep inside, she knew she'd been shying away from confirming her relationship with Neil by avoiding making it official. It was unfair and cowardly and she decided then that it had to stop.

She'd tracked Neil down and caught him in the hospital foyer, already changed and ready to head home. She'd dragged him with her towards the elevator, explaining on the way that she wanted to tell Andrews about their relationship. She'd paused before pressing the button to call the elevator, asking him "Are you okay with this?", to which he'd grinned and replied, "Of course, I've just been waiting on you." She'd grinned back, breathless from running down to catch him and from the thought of what she was about to commit to. She remembers standing there, realizing he had on the same outfit as that other time Andrews stopped them from making out in the elevator.

Something about that had made her want to relive that moment and give it a different ending. When it arrived, she'd pulled him into the elevator, hit the button for the fifth floor and then jabbed at the door close button until the metal box had sealed around them. Audrey remembers Neil's smile against her lips when she pulls him in, his thumb tracing her jawline and the way their tongues danced. She remembers it feeling like an eternity but also much too short at the same time as well as the sound of her heartbeat in her ears over their heavy breathing when they finally pulled away, a floor away from their destination. She recalls thinking it had been a miracle that no one had been waiting for the lift anyway between the first and fifth floors.

Audrey curses her brain for bringing up that particular memory, knowing Neil is still smiling at her even as she stares hard at her shoes. As the elevator doors start to close, she holds her breath, reminding herself that now is not the time to be that girl. She's not going to fall into another _Grey's_ cliché by making up with her ex-boyfriend with an elevator kiss. Her determined concentration is shattered by Murphy catching the door just before it closes. She can't help but feel amused by the irony of it. She'd never expect Shaun Murphy to be the one to save her from an awkward social situation.


End file.
